By Deirdre Loftus
In November, Katie Koester came to Paul Smith’s. She discussed her experience as a sexual assault survivor and how she became an advocate against sexual violence on college campuses. She described the night leading up to her assault, as well as the public backlash she received after coming forward. Katie’s words evoked both tears and laughter from the audience. They gave us some insight to what it is like for survivors after an assault, and pushed us to think critically about what we can do to support survivors in our communities.
For many students this was their first time listening to a rape survivor, but it was not mine. As a Rape Crisis Counselor and Prevention Educator, Katie’s story was one in a long list of stories people have shared with me.
I’ve watched adult men break down in tears while remembering sexual violence they experienced from boyfriends, girlfriends, family members, or friends; I’ve sat with a four-year-old as she told me about the “games” her mom’s boyfriend used to play with her; I’ve supported college freshman as they grapple with the Title IX process. I’ve seen how scary and intimidating it can be for survivors to come forward after an assault and I’ve been inspired by incredible people as they heal after living through unspeakable moments.
My job is to raise awareness about consent, sexual health, and sexual violence. And I want to make sure every voice on campus is heard and every question regarding sexual health is answered. I recognize the difficulty in understanding the definition of consent; I know some people are unsure of whether they were raped or not; I see men and women on campus who are frustrated about what students are required to do when it comes to hooking up.
Asking a question in a class or approaching a person is difficult, and that’s why I am partnering with The Apollos to launch “Ask An Advocate,” a new project making it easier for you to be heard. We will set up boxes around campus where you can anonymously ask a question, leave a comment, or share a story. I will respond to your words each month in The Apollos. We want to hear from you. We want to hear your questions, your criticism, your concerns, your stories, your voice.
More information to come about where boxes will be placed on campus.
Deirdre Loftus
Deirdre Loftus is a Sexual Assault Prevention Educator serving Paul Smith’s. She works for Planned Parenthood raising awareness about New York State’s “Enough is Enough” legislation. She has previously been as a Sexual Assault Counselor and Community Educator in Essex County.